Three guys walk into a bar—Jim, Jack, and Johnnie. It sounds like the opening line of some lame joke, doesn’t it? But these “three guys” are actually Jim Beam, Jack Daniel’s, and Johnnie Walker and together they make up the Three Wise Men.
That’s a drink that’s made up of equal parts of each beverage, and you’re supposed to shoot it straight if you can. Of course, you can always sip it like a cocktail if you want. You can drink it neat or on the rocks. You’re already mixing three strong drinks into one. At this point, there are no rules except don’t drink and drive.
You’re also supposed to hold your liquor, so you have to be very careful with this one. It’s a favorite drink among the “It’s my 21st birthday today” set, though many of them tend to curse it the next day. If you don’t watch out, you’re going to get blitzed.
No one really knows who should be credited (or blamed) with the creation of the 3 Wise Men, but after its introduction, the floodgates opened with a horde of variations on the theme. Now we have drinks that feature the 3, and now there’s even a 4 Horsemen version that’s getting a lot of hype too.
If you’re curious, here are some of the recipes you may want to try out. Most of them aren’t for the faint of heart!
3 Wise Men on a Hunt (aka 3 Wise Men Go Hunting)
Jim, Jack, and Johnnie are joined by Wild Turkey bourbon.
3 Wise Men on Acid
Jim, Jack, and Johnnie are mixed with absinthe, which may or may not be legal where you are. Absinthe is supposed to cause psychedelic experiences.
3 Wise Men Hit Manhattan
A Manhattan is traditionally made with 50 ml of rye whiskey, 20 ml of sweet red vermouth, and a dash of Angostura bitters. But this time, you replace the rye whiskey with the Jim, Jack, and Johnnie mix.
Stir it over ice, and then strain it into a chilled glass. It’s up to you if you want to garnish it with a maraschino cherry.
3 Men and a Baby
It’s Jim, Jack, and Johnnie with milk.
3 Wise Men and a Mexican
Jim, Jack, and Johnnie are joined by the fun-loving and not-so-costly Jose Cuervo, though any type of tequila will do in a pinch.
3 Wise Men Go Hunting in Mexico
It’s Jim, Jack, and Johnnie, with Jose Cuervo and Wild Turkey.
3 Southern Wise Men
This time, it’s a mix of Jim Beam, Jack Daniels, and Jose Cuervo. Where’s Johnnie? Well, he’s a Scotch from Scotland and a Northerner, so he’s not Southern.
3 Dudes in a Booth
Now Jim, Jack, and Johnnie are back, and this time they’re topped with a scoop of whipped cream. For this, you need a shot glass and you drink it with a straw.
3 Trini Wise Men
This time, Jose Cuervo replaces Jim Beam and joins up with Jack Daniel’s and Johnnie Walker Red. Trini refers to a guy from Trinidad (and Tobago).
3 Tropical Wise Men
Jack Daniel’s is the only one remaining from the original trio. This time, he’s joined by Jose Cuervo and the less-pricey Captain Morgan.
3 Christmas Wise Men
Jim, Jack, and Johnnie are out of the picture. They’ve been replaced by the more wholesome combo of Jägermeister, cinnamon schnapps, and peppermint schnapps.
3 Wise Men on a Farm
This time, you have Jack Daniel’s and Jim Beam without Johnnie. The duo is joined by Yukon Jack Canadian whisky and Wild Turkey bourbon.
You also don’t mix these up. Instead, you line up 4 shot glasses with a shot of each drink. Afterwards, there’s a good chance you’re going to buy the farm if you’re not careful!
3 Wise Men and the Apocalypse
Jim, Jack, and Johnnie are joined by the highly flammable 151-proof Bacardi 151.
3 Wise Men, and Hell Follows
It’s Jim, Jack, and Johnnie, plus Everclear.
3 Wise Men in a Boat
Jim, Jack, and Johnnie mix with Grand Marnier.
3 Wise Men Go To Sea
It’s Jim, Jack, and Johnnie on an adventure with Captain Morgan rum.
3 Wise Men and a Drummer
Jim, Jack, and Johnnie play around with Drambuie.
4 Horsemen
It’s the 3 Wise Men (Jim, Jack, and Johnnie), and now they’re joined by the more expensive Jameson Whiskey.
4 Horsemen Go to Hell!
You don’t mix the 4 Horsemen (Jim, Jack, and Johnnie plus Jameson) in a single glass. Instead, you take a shot of each drink.
Yes, you’re supposed to drink responsibly. But if you’re going to try any of these, good luck with that!